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Nicole Sullivan and Will Sasso welcome the new cast members, who say a demonic prayer to help them get through the first episode; CNN presents a political version of The Newlywed Game featuring Bill and Hillary Clinton vs. Donald and Melania Trump rather than a legitimate debate, which depresses Wolf Blitzer; Dora the Explorer explores the seedy side of Los Angeles; Elizabeth Warren upstages Hillary Clinton during a campaign speech; a couple can't keep up with a Game of Thrones recap; Kenny Rogers appears on The Bachelorette's landmark 56th season; HBO First Look goes behind the scenes of an animated reboot of Cinderella featuring the vocal "talents" of Nicki Minaj, Steve Buscemi, Penelope Cruz, Lena Dunham, Kristen Stewart, Tony Danza, and Tracy Morgan; a woman's veteran ex-boyfriend becomes a lounge singer and sings about how she abandoned him and his daughter; Ned Stark from Game of Thrones runs for President in 2016 and makes lewd comments about his daughter.

Ike Barinholtz meets Amir K and Piotr Michael and shows them secret compartments hiding booze, pills, and a feral Bobby Lee; Bobby Lee shows Ike Barinholtz their new child; a deranged woman known as Princess Polly (Craig) works the parking lot of a Disneyland-esque theme park; James Bond (Ray) gets rescued by The Blind Kung-Fu Master (Lee); a look at the Rio 2016 Olympics; Ike and Bobby go on Shark Tank; Lyric Lewis invites Idina Menzel (Ortiz) and Kristen Chenoweth (Craig) onstage to sing the national anthem; overly-sensitive millennials (Ortiz, K, Lewis, and Ray) host a college talk show called Safe Space and Melissa McCarthy (Davison) calls them out on their behavior; a third-grade teacher (Davison) has a solution to bullying in her classroom.

State Farm Insurance commercial parody where drivers summon their insurance agents during awkward moments; Debra Wilson and Aries Spears return; suicide hotline callers (K, Lewis & Ortiz) are plagued with calls from people who think the hotline is for spoilers about the movie Suicide Squad; an updated version of The Cosby Show centers on Bill Cosby's sexual misconduct; a ghetto court stenographer named Sumbrella (Howard) complicates a slip and fall case; Belma Buttons (Spears) and Tovah McQueen (Wilson) return for another installment of Reality Check where they call out Megyn Kelly (Craig); Octavia Spencer (Lewis) appears on an Iranian talk show; Jeff Goldblum (Michael) rambles his way through a grocery store commercial; sexual tension brews between Oprah Winfrey (Wilson) and her friend Gayle King (Lewis) during a WeightWatchers commercial.

Match Game gets a political, modern-day update hosted by Alec Baldwin (Ray); Mo Collins' Lorraine returns to annoy a gym trainer; new album recorded by a diabetic R&B singer (Howard); Donald Trump (Michael) and Hillary Clinton (Nicole Sullivan) sing a duet about the insanity and improbability of both of them running for U.S. President; an episode of The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon includes Ariana Grande (Craig) and Pitbull (Ray) playing knife games with Fallon (Michael) for charity; Donald Trump (Michael) spouts off on Confessions of a Terrifically Huge Mind; Talking Dead gets recursive with nested spin-offs; Darlene McBride (Sullivan) returns with her FOX News Car Karaoke special; Arnold Schwarzenegger (Michael) does a PSA against steroids.

Dora the Explorer (Ortiz) ventures to Las Vegas where she ends up at a strip club; Kim Jong-Un (Bobby Lee) joins the #RichKidsOfBeverlyHills on E!'s latest reality show; MTV's Flow welcomes a rapper whose lyrics aren't hardcore; Donald Trump (Michael) creates Trump Elementary and nearly makes out with his daughter, Ivanka (Craig); Jamiele Hall (Lewis) gets hit on by Tank (Lee); an Amish woman (Davison) is the entertainment at a bachelor party; a man from India (Amir K) struggles with baseball announcer banter; Bernie Sanders (Michael) fumbles with his new SmartPhone.

Anjelah Johnson gets too into her role as Bon Qui Qui; Sumbrella (Howard) gets into crime scene investigation; a Walking Dead cliffhanger stretches out the suspense to ridiculous levels; Bon Qui Qui (Johnson) returns to King Burger; Empire parody featuring Justin Timberlake (John Barinholtz), Adele (Davison), and Ariana Grande (Craig), trying to sign with Empire Records while putting up with the inside drama at the studio; Amir K rents out Adam Ray's, Carlie Craig's, and Michelle Ortiz's dressing rooms; a half-fish Kardashian sister (Davison) is introduced on Keeping Up with the Kardashians; a cooking show for stoners; a parody of $100,000 Pyramid; Bon Qui Qui plugs Homegirl Security.

"Hermanos Bros. Law"; Carlie Craig gains telekinetic powers after binge-watching Stranger Things; a "good cop/bad cop" scenario where the "bad cop" (Ray) is a douchebag; Britney Spears (Craig) reveals five secrets about herself; Miss Swan (Alex Borstein) becomes a cartoon character; advertisers try to make guns more appealing to American consumers; the female cast members play Fuck, Marry, Kill and Chelsea Davison reveals that she'd do all three to Piotr Michael; Alex Borstein and Will Sasso talk about their time on MADtv where they had it tougher than the new cast; Piotr Michael's Morgan Freeman narrator voice annoys a hungover Adam Ray; an HBO First Look at celebrity auditions for The Michael McLeod (Sasso) and Jasmine Wayne-Wayne (Borstein) Story; Piotr Michael annoys Lyric Lewis.

A crisis group centered on people who were injured while being saved by The Flash; Will Sasso and Bobby Lee play crazy ex-boyfriends; The Bachelor in Paradise shows indiscriminate hook-ups and a spreading herpes infection; Adam Ray needs a translator for the female cast members shortened slang; a wine steward (Ray) steals a man's girlfriend; Jeremy D. Howard reads his Yelp reviews; another installment of Iran's Hollywood Minute; Bernie Sanders (Michael) becomes KFC's new Colonel Sanders.