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THE KICK-OFF: Legendary coach José Mourinho gives Jack Whitehall driving lessons, but what will José do when Jack makes fun of his hair? Plus, Gareth Bale takes a summer job pranking unsuspecting (and terrified) guests in a Spanish wax museum! I guess he needed something productive to do this summer…

RUSSIAN FOOD ROULETTE: The F2Freestylers join Jack Whitehall for a disgusting game of Russian Food Roulette! Will anyone chunder?!

ENGLAND: Jack Whitehall learns some Jamaican culture from Raheem Sterling, spends the night in a haunted mansion with Dele Alli, and epically pranks Simon Cowell with Kyle Walker! Not much going on in this episode then…

BELGIUM: Jack Whitehall tries to help Jan Vertonghen and Mousa Dembélé with his experimental, possibly illegal, form of meditation…

50/50 FOOTBALL QUIZ: Jack Whitehall is joined by Caspar Lee, ComedyShortsGamer Deji, the F2Freestylers, Joe Wicks, Saffron Barker, AnEsonGib, Manny & Helen Anderson for a tricky 50/50 Football Trivia Quiz!

GERMANY: Jack Whitehall visits an authentic beer hall with Thomas Müller for some traditional beer pong, attempts to record a hit new football song with Jérôme Boateng, and is thoroughly impressed by Mario Götze’s “mannschaft”! Who said that the English and Germans don’t get along!?

"MANNSCHAFT MUSIC VIDEO: England and Germany join forces as Jack Whitehall & Jérôme Boateng spit some bars to create a football song, “Mannschaft”!

IT’S ALL ABOUT THE BENJAMINS: Jack Whitehall quizzes Benjamin Mendy on his Benjamin knowledge, but isn’t totally convinced that he doesn’t know Ben Dover!

PENALTY CHALLENGE: Jack Whitehall challenges Joe Sugg to an incredibly frustrating dizzy/blindfolded/backheel penalty contest!

SPAIN: Jack challenges Cesc Fàbregas and Álvaro Morata to dizzy blindfolded penalties. After accidentally kicking Cesc, the gears are in motion for Jack to meet up with NBA legend Rip Hamilton and be in the centre of a BRUTAL prank! You will also see, genuinely, the most insane blindfolded half-court shot EVER!!

FALCAO DE TOILETTE: The totally real advert for Radamel Falco’s new perfume, Falcao de Toilette. Featuring a seasick Jack Whitehall.

RUSSIAN DANCING: Have you ever wanted to see Jack Whitehall, Caspar Lee, Joe Wicks, Roman Kemp, Maya Jama & Manny attempt a variety of different Russian dances, each more challenging than the last? Of course you have.

NARSTIE OR NICE: If there’s one man who knows football kits, it’s grime superstar Big Narstie. Together, Jack & Big Narstie himself critique some of the stand-out kits of years gone by. ""Peru is SICK!""

WORLD'S WORST FOODS: In a truly revolting turn of events, some of the biggest YouTubers on the planet attempt to eat some of the most disgusting foods ever concoted. So. Much. Fermenting. Featuring: Caspar Lee, Maya Jama, AnEsonGib, F2 Freestylers, ComedyShortsGamer, Helen Anderson, Roman Kemp & Joe Wicks.

WORLD TOUR: A Korea highlight for Jack Whitehall as he hosts a ludicrous gameshow with Dele Alli & Son Heung-min. Elsewhere, things get fragrant with Radamel Falcao, Tim Cahill recreates a Beckham masterpiece with some help from the F2Freestylers & it's The Whitehall Family vs. The Schmeichel Family in some lads ’n’ Dads dinner party games.

RUSSIAN PHRASES: Jack Whitehall teaches some useful(?) football-related Russian phrases to Caspar Lee, Maya Jama, Joe Wicks, Saffron Barker, Roman Kemp, AnEsonGib and Manny! With plenty of ‘banski’! That’s Russian for ‘banter’ (it’s definitely not - we Googled it).

MOURA OR LESS: It’s pun-city as Jack Whitehall sits down with Brazil & Spurs legend Lucas Moura in a battle of wits and guile. Try to play along at home to see if you can get 'Moura Less' than Lucas Moura!

HOT WING CHALLENGE: England & Man City winger Raheem Sterling takes on grime superstar Big Narstie & Mr Whitehall himself in a devilishly difficult Hot Wing Challenge! Just wait until you hear some of the painful noises these guys make...

THE ART OF FOOTBALL: Jack Whitehall challenges YouTubers Caspar Lee, ComedyShortsGamer Deji, the F2Freestylers, Helen Anderson and AnEsonGib to a Win, Lose or Draw football drawing game! Spoiler alert: they’re not that good at drawing...

Check out the finale to Jack’s alternative opening ceremony right here. Featuring odes to Vladimir Putin, Zinedine Zidane’s headbutt, Diego Maradona’s handball, Diana Ross’ epic penalty miss and so much more!